The Worst Advice I Have Ever Been Given

Life is full of decisions.

Everyday we make decisions, some are pretty inconsequential and require little to no thought. Then there are decisions that are big. These are decisions that require a lot of thought and impact our lives.

We have all been faced with these kinds of choices in our lives. Do I ask her to marry me? Do I leave a job to take another? Do I move out of state? Do I . . .?

There have been a few times in my life where I have been faced with REALLY BIG decisions and knew that the choice I made would have a significant impact on mine and my family's lives.

During one of these seasons, I was speaking to a colleague about some of the things I had been weighing and my thought process. Somewhere toward the end of the conversation he said, "I can't tell you what to do, but I would say follow your heart."

Sounds like good advice and encouragement, right?

I do believe my friend meant well with his reply, however, it is undoubtedly the worst advice I have ever been given.

My Heart Problem

I don't know about you, but I can be fickle.

I can get all amped up about one thing or another, make grand plans and go all-in on something only to have it fizzle weeks later. The great idea or opportunity that I became enamored with, seems to fade over time and all the energy I generated around it is gone.

This up and down of emotions is often the outcome when I "lead with my heart". It may also be why God tells us so much about our hearts including His words from the prophet Jeremiah who wrote, "The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it?"

Not exactly a ringing endorsement, but I also believe that Solomon also knew that all of us have a heart sickness and is why he encourages to "guard our hearts above all else".

Where Do I Go?

So if our hearts are not a reliable source for decision making, where does one go when faced with big decisions?

Here are a few things that we find in Scripture that will help us make better decisions when they come up in our lives.

• Ask God for It - James, in His epistle tells us that, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach". My favorite word in that sentence is "generously". I do not have to guess or follow a sick heart, I can ask God for wisdom and He is more than happy to supply it in abundance.

• Seek Godly Counsel - The book of Proverbs is full of wisdom and multiple times throughout the book emphasizes the need for Godly advice and the victory that can be found with a multitude of sound counselors.

• Get Out of Your Own Way - Proverbs 3: 5-6 tells us the following, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Rather than trusting my heart or my gut, I can fill my heart with trust in God.

It seems pretty simple doesn't it?

Yet, there are many times where I chase my tail trying to make a decision, only to find that the three steps God has given us above produce great outcomes and are for my own good.

Leave Your Heart Out of It

The next time you are faced with a big decision, I encourage you to leave your heart out of it unless you are going all in on trusting the Lord to guide and direct you through His wisdom and through the Godly friends who you seek for advice.

When these things are embraced, we will experience a better life and have a far better model for making decisions than our unreliable, sick and fickle hearts.

On the journey with you,

Carlos

This edition was first published in The Life Design Newsletter on LinkedIn.